Caged and Freed

Dec. 3

I will praise you, Lord, among the nations; I will tell of your name to my kin. Ps 18 (17):50; 22 (21):23

One of the things that has been bothering me since my daughter's death has been an image I've had of her after her death.

She was suspended in a cage in a place that was neither heaven nor hell, but it was not a good place. It wasn't a place she knowingly chose for herself. Perhaps it was built by actions or inactions during her life, but she didn't really know what to do to get out. She was just there.

Maybe limbo is a good word for it, although I don't think that is what official church teaching means regarding limbo.

Nevertheless, that is the image that has haunted my thoughts during moments when I have quieted my heart to listen and opened my eyes to see.

I didn't know what to do either and initially was afraid to ask, fearful that the time for freeing her had passed.

But it continued to haunt me so I finally did ask the Lord how to free my daughter from the cage.

Within a short time after asking, I felt compelled to pray the Rosary and oh, I am so happy that I did! 

While praying it, the image came to mind again as well as images of demons circling the cage.

Then, here came the Queen of Heaven herself to set my daughter free from the cage! She was accompanied by St. Michael and our Guardian Angels and my beautiful baby was freed from the cage and carried to a place of safety, where she rests in the presence of Our Lady.

My daughter rests there, content for now but  waiting. 

Thank you, Blessed Mother, St. Michael and our Guardian Angels for freeing my daughter from the cage. 

Loss and Heartache

Dec. 2

To you, I lift up my soul, O my God. In you, I have trusted; let me not be put to shame. Nor let my enemies exult over me; and let none who hope in you be put to shame. Cf. Ps 25 (24):1-3

My darling daughter returned on Dec. 1, 2018 to the heavenly home prepared for her by the One who loves her. She was young. A mere 43 years has passed since that blessed day when she came into this world. A gift of our love.

I am still trying to grasp the meaning of this death, as all bereaved parents do, and find my questions have few answers.

It was an accident. She fell and hit her head. What caused the fall will be determined by an autopsy. 

The thing is, I think I was with her in spirit as she surrendered to death. 

The day of her death was a strange day for me. I didn't leave my house. I spent the day in prayer and began some of the projects I have been procrastinating on beginning. 

I began the Christmas Anticipation prayer of St. Andrew and also recommitted to praying the Rosary. 

During these prayers, my heart was ever thinking of my beloved daughter. We had spent the Thanksgiving holiday together and when she left, I missed her terribly. I spent the day of her death talking to her silently, in my heart.

Those passing comments now seem to have more meaning, deeper meaning.

There was something happening in my heart and soul as if the Lord was preparing me for her passing. 

I have asked the Lord many times to send her someone who will love her as she deserves to be loved. She was divorced a couple of years ago and has since struggled to find her identity, her worth as a single woman.

I wanted her to know that sweet, sweet love of Christ because she has been so heartbroken and become somewhat hardhearted since her divorce. The line from the St. Andrew prayer is "In that hour, vouchsafe, O my God! to hear my prayer and grant my desires, through the merits of Our Saviour Jesus Christ, and of His Blessed Mother. Amen."

My prayer and my desire was for her to know "true love."

As I was praying, I somehow felt the surrender of her heart, leaving us behind as she entered into the Presence of True Love, although I thought at the time it meant she would meet someone. Little did I know that the "someone" was "The Someone."

I think her MS had caused far more damage to her strong little body than she let anyone know. I saw little signs that she wasn't functioning as she should. 

As so often happens, the answer to my prayer and deepest desire was an answer that I wasn't expecting.
Yet, how can I regret her leaving us to be with her True Love?
Thank you, Lord.

The Spirit Working

"God gives prayer growth precisely according to our degree of readiness for it. He forces no one. According as we are more or less receptive, He bestows more or less depth of communion. In the same manner, five hundred people in a parish church all hear the same sound waves during the homily, but they profit from it exactly as they are or are not disposed for the message. Jesus taught the same truth in his parable of the sower: from the word of God some hearers yield nothing at all, while others yield thirty or sixty or a hundredfold." — Fr. Thomas Dubay, p. 114

AN EXCERPT FROM

Fire Within

I have been a little stressed over some loved ones missing Mass.

Then the Spirit told me to recognize that unless they have a relationship with Jesus, the Christ, going to Mass is just a chore for them. 

I know this but somehow imagined they did love Christ, did love You, my sweet Lord and God. You have blessed them mightily and I recognize this because the blessings You have bestowed on them are prayers of mine that You answered. 

It makes my heart sing with joy as I am now able to completely surrender this matter to You.

It is between You and them and I will surrender it to You. 

Thank you for those answered prayers and blessings. Please now open their hearts to get to know You. And love You. And want to come to Mass to join in Communion and worship and praise with You and all of us. Amen.

Taking offense

"We want God to suffer everything from us, and we are not able to suffer anything from anyone. We exaggerate beyond measure the faults committed against us; worms that we are, we take the slightest pressure exerted on us to be an enormous attack. Meanwhile, we count as nothing what we undertake proudly against the sovereign majesty of God and the rights of his empire!"

  ~ An excerpt from Meditations for Lent by  Bishop Jacques-Benigne Bossuet, p. 49-51

This struck me as a true explanation of our culture today. Everyone is so offended and takes great offense at such small slights, yet we give no thought to the truly deep offenses that we commit against our Lord.

Have mercy on us, Lord. Thank you for your great love for us and for dying and rising from the dead for us.

You are worthy of all our love. Please bless me with the grace to be kind and joyful in all circumstances that I might honor your sacrifice for me.

Message from Mother

I know that the apparitions from Medjugorje have not been officially approved by the church. 

However, as something that spoke to my heart this day, I share it, with love from Blessed Mother.

Dear children,

Through the great love of the Heavenly Father I am beside you as your mother and you are beside me as my children, as apostles of my love whom I ceaselessly gather around me.

My children, you are those who, along with prayer, need to completely surrender to my Son so that you may no longer live but my Son may live in you—so that all those who do not know my Son may see Him in you and come to desire to know Him.

Pray that in you they may see resolute humility and goodness, a readiness to serve others; that in you they may see that you live your vocation in the world with the heart, in communion with my Son; that in you they may see meekness, tenderness and love for my Son as well as for all brothers and sisters.

Apostles of my love, you must pray much and cleanse your hearts so that you may be the first to walk on the way of my Son, that you may be the just who are united with the justice of my Son.

My children, as apostles of my love, you must be united in the communion which emanates from my Son, so that my children who do not know my Son may recognize the communion of love and may come to desire to walk on the way of life, the way of unity with my Son.

Thank you.
 

~from an email I receive from Queen of Peace Productions each time one of the seers receives a message from Mary that can be shared. 

Sent from my Samsung Galaxy smartphone.

Easter Sunday

"God chose ordinary people to share his good news. In other words, he chose people just like us.

Why would God choose such a humble risky strategy?

...two possibilities:

First, Jesus wants us to experience his love through each other. He wants us to feel his presence through the generosity, the affection, and the humility of his followers. That's why he has called us to be a Church—so that he can work through us to change the world. It's why he calls us to gather around the altar as brothers and sisters."

~excerpt from meditation on today's first reading from Acts 10:41 in The Word Among Us.

Although I cannot find the exact words, the closing prayer last night was something along the lines of "so that we may be one mind and one heart" and Fr's homily was on the importance of love.

It comes together as the gift of Easter. The gift of love and how Jesus manifests it in our lives, through others.

My need is to make Christ the center. Not myself, but Christ.

Amen, alleluia. Happy Easter. 

Sent from my Samsung Galaxy smartphone.

Easter Triduum, Holy Saturday

"Have I lost the joy of the marvel of the first encounter with Jesus? Today is a day for listening."

~Pope Francis from The Hope of Lent

Before Easter Vigil Services 

Indeed as I reflect on my life, except for moments here and there, I have lost the joy of my marvelous first encounter with Jesus. I do want to experience it in its fullness this Easter. I want to meet "the Bridegroom of my soul" again this Holy night.

After Easter Vigil Services

I thank you and praise You, my God and King, Bridegroom of my soul for granting to me such stupendous gifts this night.

I wrote the meditation verse earlier on this day, before I had gone to Easter vigil services on this night. Before you granted to me once again the joy I have been missing. 

It was such an affirmation because everything I have thought before was once again proven true. 

It is so incredible to be of one heart and mind with others of this wonderful faith community you have blessed here in our valley.

I know now that when the time comes for the light of Christ to be exalted and adored during the days of darkness that there will be the Bridegroom of my heart to help me and be with me.

Thank you, sweet Jesus, for your life, your love and your peace. They are the most precious gifts You have shared with me and I am awestruck by Your love.

Amen. Hallelujah, hallelujah!

Sent from my Samsung Galaxy smartphone.

Easter Triduum; Good Friday

Good morning, my Lord!

I know You are currently being held, awaiting the moment and hour when the Jewish Sanhedrin will confirm the death sentence upon You that they determined was the sentence for Your "crime."

Even though they held Your trial during the night, illegally according to some, the Sanhedrin must pronounce the sentence during the daylight hours. 

Galling to them, they must also get approval from the Roman Procounsel to carry out the sentence and it is because of this that You will be crucified, the Roman method for executing criminals.

Last night, while I held vigil with You, I asked what You wanted from me. I have given You, through my Consecration to You through Your Blessed Mother, my life and yet I have not yet given to You what Your most Sacred and Holy Heart desires most..my time.

Admittedly and with sorrow for my selfishness, I had already asked You for the desires of my heart. Forgive me for always being so selfish. 

I resolve to do better this day and on future days with whatever time remains to me. I give You not only my life but my time.

I know I haven't always done well with my obsessive desires for viewing old tv shows and movies and more recently with news blogs. None of those are more important to me and I firmly resolve, with Your assistance, to give my time and attention to You instead. 

I ask Blessed Mother for her help in this matter as well. As we stand with You at the foot of the cross where You poured out Your life for me, I resolve to do better this day. One day at a time.

I don't want to stand before Your Resurrected holy Person and have You tell me that I preferred those things to You.

Sent from my Samsung Galaxy smartphone.

Easter Triduum; Maundy Thursday

"The time I have on the rocky edge runs thin. I'll have to descend soon enough, but for a moment I feel the grandeur of creation and my smallness in it. For a moment I have no worries, only the sense of God's abiding grace in the world. It is that sense to which all penance points—a clearing away, an opening to the light all around. It is the way of humility, the poverty of spirit, which lets us see it."

~from Learning to live Poorer, a meditation for Lent by Ragan Sutterfield

The joy of this evening's festivities and the great gifts offered to humanity: the priesthood, the Mass and the Eucharist,  will be overshadowed soon by the betrayal of the our Lord.

I will spend an hour with Him in the Garden this night.

Lord, please speak to my heart tonight.

Sent from my Samsung Galaxy smartphone.

Spy Wednesday

I had never heard of the Wednesday of Holy Week being referred to as Spy Wednesday until this year.

So called because this is the day Judas Iscariot makes the deal with temple authorities to turn Jesus over to them at the first possible opportunity. 

In the book The Day Christ Died by Jim Bishop, Mr. Bishop's research indicates that the temple powers that be wanted the arrest and trial of Jesus done quickly and more importantly, quietly. They did not want to provoke the followers of Jesus to riot and thereby risk the wrath of Pontias Pilate and Rome.

Until it was too late, Judas Iscariot did not realize he was a pawn in a power move between the Jewish leaders and Roman authorities. When he finally glimpsed the truth, he despaired so deeply that he took his own life, driven mad by the knowledge that he had turned over a kind and gentle man.

Bishop implies that if Judas believed in Jesus as the Messiah he might have asked~and been granted~forgiveness for his betrayal. 

Lord, please grant to me the sure knowledge of your Divine nature that I might not betray you.

Forgive me when I do, not intentionally, but because of fear and weakness.

I love you. Increase my love and devotion. 

Sent from my Samsung Galaxy smartphone.

Anticipation

During my Rosary today, it occurred to be how excited I am about the upcoming week, culminating in it's celebration of the Resurrection.

Jesus, on the other hand, in His holy anticipation of the upcoming events was in such agony that He sweat blood. 

Oh, my Lord! I am truly sorry for having offended You. I pray that I might try to please You by my actions in this present moment and that everything I do somehow grants You the honor you are due.

I do not yet have a true idea of the agony You endured for me. 

I know only that I love You for loving and forgiving me.

Sent from my Samsung Galaxy smartphone.

Monday of Holy Week

According to tradition, today is the day Jesus was so righteously angered that He overthrew the money changers tables.

This move so threatened the powers that be in the Temple hierarchy that it confirmed their decision to put Him to death.

Lord, forgive us, for we know not what we do.

Sent from my Samsung Galaxy smartphone.

Consecration

"I entrust myself to you because you do not disappoint; I do not understand, but even without understanding, I entrust myself to your hands."

~Pope Francis from The Hope of Lent

Today is the fifth anniversary of my Consecration to Jesus through Mary. 

I hope I am making progress in my journey to what I hope is sainthood. Sometimes it feels like it is and sometimes it doesn't as I continue to struggle with the same things over and over.

But throughout the journey, Blessed Mother is with me and her gentle guiding is getting me there, although the route is circuitous..mostly due to my own intransigence. 

Thank you, my Lord for providing me with such a wonderful way to get closer to union with you...the heart of Your mother.

Sent from my Samsung Galaxy smartphone.

Mission

A meditation on St. Catherine of Sienna today states...

"Out of her periods of contemplation, she reached out in spiritual letters to 

Enlighten and instruct others."

"Catherine understood well the realities of the world, but used her spirituality, intelligence and skills as a writer and reconciler to assist the church in her time."

This comes in answer to my question: "What is my mission, Lord?"

It seems quite hubristic to me to think I can enlighten and or instruct anyone about anything but then I am reminded that it won't be me but the Holy Spirit in me who is doing both.

I felt something at Mass tonight..a quickening of my heart as we heard the Passion of our Lord. Just faintly, a hint of something so much larger than myself. 

Rightly I should be concerned with You, my Lord and Your Passion. It was more real to me than it has been in the past, but I was still focused on the strange feeling in my heart.

Blessed Mother, please take me heart and give me yours that I might live your Son's Passion as you did.

The other thing which was interesting to me, given my predeliction for being consumed by the news is the following, which was also one of my meditations:

"Use today's news headlines as a springboard for meditation."

Lord, I love you. Help me to love you more.

Sent from my Samsung Galaxy smartphone.

Joy of loving God

"Keep the joy of loving God in your heart and share this joy with all you meet, especially your family. Be holy."

— St. Mother Teresa of Calcutta 

Sent from my Samsung Galaxy smartphone.

Laziness or sloth

Today on an EWTN radio program, the caller asked the question about laziness...not being disciplined enough to follow through on many things. 

Something Fr said hit a cord with me...even though I have known this.

He said we must overcome laziness because it is the work of the devil and also we will be asked to answer for every moment of our lives.

So, I begin again to try to discipline myself to overcome my sloth and I ask you Lord for forgiveness for my failures to do what you ask of me. I will work on myself again tomorrow. 

Sent from my Samsung Galaxy smartphone.

What is your mission?

The question is put to me: "What is your mission?"

The answer eludes me but these are the

readings that seemed to speak to my heart today:

"God is love and in himself he lives a mystery of personal loving communion. Creating the human race in his own image . . . God inscribed in the humanity of man and woman the vocation, and thus the capacity and responsibility, of love and communion. . . . Love is the fundamental and innate vocation of every human being." ~CCC 2331, 2392

"The explosion of passion and purpose takes place when unique abilities and needs meet." 

~ from Focus in Best Lent Ever, March 21, 2018

"When will the happy time come when the divine Mary will be established Mistress and Queen of all hearts, in order that she may subject them fully to the empire of her great and holy Jesus? When will souls breathe Mary as the body breathes air? When that time comes, wonderful things will happen in those lowly places where the Holy Ghost, finding His dear spouse, as it were, reproduced, in all souls, shall come in with abundance, and fill them to overflowing with His gifts, and particularly with the gift of wisdom, to work miracles of grace."

— St. Louis de Montfort, p.118-19

Do they somehow tie together and answer the elusive question of mission? Is mission the same as vocation?

Lord, grant me the wisdom to know my mission today. Teach me your ways, Oh Lord.

Sent from my Samsung Galaxy smartphone.

I am Yours

Lord, I am Yours, and I must belong to no one but You. My soul is Yours, and must live only by You.

~St. Francis de Sales~ 

Lord, please help me. I don't know why I do nothing, am able to accomplish nothing. 

I give myself to You, through Mary. 

Please help me.

Sent from my Samsung Galaxy smartphone.

The Strength of Faith

"All those who have the strength of faith are stronger. Faith makes you live according to what is good and then the light of God's love always comes at the desired moment. That is the strength which sustains in pain and suffering. My children, pray for the strength of faith, trust in the Heavenly Father, and do not be afraid."

Our Lady to Mirjana Dragicevic-Soldo; March 18, 2018 annual apparition

All I can say is Amen!

Sent from my Samsung Galaxy smartphone.

Dying to self

"The cross teaches us that we, like Jesus, give as much to others in our passivities as in our activities. When we are no longer in charge, when we are beaten down by whatever—humiliated, suffering, and unable even to make ourselves understood by our loved ones—then we are undergoing our own passion and, like Jesus in his passion, have in that the opportunity to give our love and ourselves to others in a very deep way."

—from The Passion and the Cross by Ronald Rolheiser, OMI

Oh my Lord! Please help me to love with the kind of love you have for each one of us.

Please let me rejoice in the plan you have for me and in the plans you have for the lives of others. Even when those plans conflict with my plans...especially when those plans conflict with my plans.

Please help me to die to self today and to live each day in the present moment.

Sent from my Samsung Galaxy smartphone.

The Painted Tree

My Lord, all I have to offer you this day is a painting I spent my time on.

I love you. Please forgive me for everything I didn't do today; for the prayers I didn't pray; for the chores I didn't do.

My skills are minimal as an artist, yet I offer it with love for You and for Blessed Mother, whom I have neglected badly this Lent.

Sent from my Samsung Galaxy smartphone.

Do not be afraid

So often I hear in the depths of my heart, "Do not be afraid." 

I often wonder, my Lord, of what am I afraid? And why do You tell me so often to NOT be? Am I so cowardly, so craven that I must hear it often?

Or, is it because I have no idea what is to come and it's Your way, Your gentle way of reminding me that, in essence, "You've got this?"

A reminder that whatever comes, I am merely to trust in you?

That is such a relief, but at the same time it also brings up the question..."What am I getting myself into?" 

Then, I hear You gently chide me, "It doesn't matter, my child, for I am with you wherever you may go and whatever you may 'get yourself into.' That is why I constantly remind you to not fear. I am there beside you and I can handle whatever comes OUR way. Oh my sweet one. Be at peace knowing you are Mine and knowing that I love you mightily."

Oh, my Lord. Thank you for loving me, thank you for forgiving me, thank you for dying for me and thank you for rising from the dead for me.

Sent from my Samsung Galaxy smartphone.

Giving of oneself

"He is able to give himself over without resentment to the demands of a love which will take his whole life. After his prayer in Gethsemane, he is able to do what he needs to do without the feeling that he is a victim. The Lord is victimized, but never a victim." 

~ Ronald Rolheiser, from a meditation for Lent: Carry the Cross of Jesus; posted on The American Catholic Blog 3/15/2018

Only after praying is Jesus able to give himself over freely and without resentment.

Lord, please grant to me the gift to give of myself without resentment and with much love. 

 

Sent from my Samsung Galaxy smartphone.

Recognition

Tonight during our religious education class discussion one of the participants said that we often only do the minimum...

Just enough to get by...

In that comment, I recognized myself.

I so often do only what is easy...the minimum.

Where might I be if I fully surrendered? If I did everything good and worthy of You, my Lord.

Please change me so that I want to do my absolute best for You. So that I do my absolute best for you.

Sent from my Samsung Galaxy smartphone.

Photo day

We went out hiking this afternoon. Here's a photo I took.

Thank you, my Lord for the gifts of this day.

Sent from my Samsung Galaxy smartphone.

What an Honor

How you have honored me, my Lord and mt God.

Those are the words you gave me today as I prepared for the Communion Service.

Before I had been thinking about how my friend was pulling me along in her wake as she discovered her ministry in taking Communion to the homebound. 

But as I was praying before the service, it dawned on me that You are bestowing such an Honor on me by including me in the mission to take You to the homebound. 

Oh, please forgive me for thinking it a burden, if only briefly.

What an incredible Honor you are granting to me. I need to pursue the personal growth you are asking me of me by cherishing each time I take You with me.

Sent from my Samsung Galaxy smartphone.

Sunday Joy

Thank you my Lord and God for this beautiful day.

Sent from my Samsung Galaxy smartphone.

The Joy of Confession

"If we dedicate more time to prayer, our hearts will reveal the lies with which we deceive ourselves, and we will find true consolation in God." ~ Pope Francis

It was with great joy that I received cleansing today in the sacrament of confession. A powerful healing and a much needed re-boot at this midway point of Lent.

Fr.   told me to continue to seek the help and guidance of the Holy Spirit with my special gift from God. It didn't dawn on me until later....sheesh will I ever "get it"...that he was referring to the gift granted me at Christmas..that of "heart to heart" conversations with those I love. 

Such a stupendous gift that I somehow forget in the light of day, so to speak. 

Thank you, my Lord and my God for Your continuing love and mercy. Thank you for your many blessings on this desert journey.

I love you. 

"In tribulation immediately draw near to God with confidence, and you will receive strength, enlightenment, and instruction."
— St. John of the Cross

Sent from my Samsung Galaxy smartphone.

Stripped bare

"Like the disciples, we need to strip ourselves of all that gives us a false sense of security and leaves us feeling like we can control our own lives. We need to leave behind the notion that we are in charge and that we can trust in ourselves, and instead trust solely in God. 

As strange as it sounds, what we need most is to seek insecurity. That's the way Jesus went on his journey. That's the way the great saints lived. And that's the path we must follow as well. It is only when we have nothing to lean on ourselves that we will be forced to lean on God in a way that we never knew we could. That's what Jesus wants." ~ Lenten Meditation by  Br Casey Cole, OFM 

Asking what Jesus wants of me has given me the above answer. He wants to send me out with nothing so that I might learn reliance on Him, rather than myself.

Lord, please grant me the grace to desire what You want for me. Amen

Sent from my Samsung Galaxy smartphone.

Empty Me

"We have so much in our lives that we feel we need to defend. If we have nothing to defend, we have room to discover the providence and the peace that relying on God alone brings to our lives." ~ Meditation on the life of St. Francis, from the Franciscan friars

Empty me, my Lord. Help me to renounce all that keeps me from knowing and loving you on a more intimate level. 

I don't know who I am meant to be. Please help me to know who you want me to be.

Amen

Sent from my Samsung Galaxy smartphone.

Daily intimate contact

"Never give up this daily intimate contact with Jesus as the real living person--not just the idea. How can we last even one day without hearing Jesus say "I love you" --impossible. Our soul needs that as much as the body needs to breathe air. If not, prayer is dead -- meditation only thinking. Jesus wants you each to hear him--speaking in the silence of your heart."

~Mother Theresa from a letter to her Missionaries of Charity 

Oh my sweet Jesus. Please let me hear you daily. Please tell me who I am to you, who you want me to be. Please let me eliminate the clutter from my heart and life that I might worship you truly and love you deeply.

Amen

Sent from my Samsung Galaxy smartphone.

Good quotes

"There is no cross to bear that Christ has not already borne for us, and does not now bear with us." ~ St.Pope JPII

"Jesus, give me a drink that will quench my thirst forever.

Jesus, change my life.

Jesus, fill me with joy.

Amen." ~ Pope Francis from The Hope of Lent

Just a couple of quotes that spoke to my heart today, my Lord and give me food for thought.

Please bless my dad with healing. Thank you.

Sent from my Samsung Galaxy smartphone.

The Most Marvelous Journey

"They would...begin the course of the most marvelous spiritual movement in the history of man." 

~ Jim Bishop, The Day Christ Died, 12 Midnight

It is the eleven apostles, standing on the edge of time between the two testaments, who are about to embark upon the journey that will change the history of mankind. 

They do not know it, of course, even though Jesus has tried to prepare them for it. On the eve of His passion these somewhat naive disciples are only hoping for an end to Roman rule, perhaps a fairer shake from Temple authorities, and a good night's sleep.

They have no clear inkling what the command to "love one another" will entail, nor of the difficulties they will face nor of the rich reward that following this command will bring.

Yet, they are still determined to follow this unique order from the man, the Son of Man, whom they have been following for the past three years.

These men, chosen by our God to change the  course of human history from one of damnation to one of salvation, are ordinary men. None are remarkable, at least yet. 

But they will lead us along a different path, toward their Lord and Master, by teaching us of His love and mercy and forgiveness;

traits that were mocked then and through all the ages that will follow.

Still, their example and courage in loving will draw multitudes who will share this love with others, and in turn draw many more multitudes of simple believers who will all proclaim that Jesus is Lord. 

That is the most marvelous tale in all history. A true story that it is still ongoing in the hearts, minds and souls of all humankind.

As the "good thief" will state in a very short time from the eve of our Lord's passion I now echo the plea: "Lord, remember me when you come into your kingdom." Amen.

Sent from my Samsung Galaxy smartphone.

Thanksgiving

I love you my Jesus. Thank you for all your blessings. 

Thank you for becoming a man so that we can be saved.

Thank you for dying for us so that we might be saved.

Thank you for personally calling me to You. Help me to stay in your love. 

Sent from my Samsung Galaxy smartphone.

The Starburst Within

Yesterday during Adoration, when I became obedient enough to sit quietly, the Lord gave me a fantastic gift.

I was focused on the Monstrance housing Our Lord and thinking about Him when I felt the starburst shape of it in my body, specifically my heart, an intimate joining.

It was amazing and I tried to hold it and cherish it deep within my heart.

Of course, such clear moments of divine intimacy are fleeting but it was a wonderful moment for me.  Just for that moment, I could feel myself radiating Christ's love outward from the Monstrance within to all with whom I would come into contact.

I pray that I will be able to live that out as I go forward on my Lenten journey with my Lord. 

Sent from my Samsung Galaxy smartphone.

Silence

"Silence can heal many wounds and show us possibilities undreamed of before--if we let it." ~ Sister Catherine Wybourne

This is a tweet I read today but it's also the message I got during Adoration today.

I was talking up a storm..while in prayer...and the Lord told me to shush and just sit quietly, absorbing His love and mercy.

Thank you Lord, for the gift of silence before you. Help me to cultivate it and spend more time quietly in your Presence.

Sent from my Samsung Galaxy smartphone.

Distortions

How distorted the concept of love has become in recent years.

I really dislike that when reading about past concepts of love and devotion my thoughts are tarnished by cynicism due to the constant promotion by our culture of the sins of the flesh: homosexuality, rape, adultery. 

I know these sins have always been a part of our fallen human nature, but I dislike that when reading something that is perfectly innocent from past ages, my first thoughts are cynical and cause even a whiff of doubt  about the goodness of saints to enter my mind.

Yet, Christ died for us. For all of us.

He died for the sinners turned saints; the fallen whom He has redeemed by His most precious body, blood, soul and divinity.

"He does not come down from Heaven each day to stay in the gold ciborium. He comes down to find another Heaven He cherishes infinitely more than the first, the Heaven of our souls, made in His image, living temples of the Most Blessed Trinity!"

— St. Therese of Lisieux, p. 31 Meditations of the Little Flower

Thank you, Jesus, for wanting to live in my soul, for helping me to cleanse it of anything unpleasant to You.

Sent from my Samsung Galaxy smartphone.

Learning humility

Oh my Lord!

I felt so humiliated last night at a class for lectors. Today, I am humbled.

Things I thought I was doing correctly to honor you as a lector turned out to not be correct or properly done.

I felt humiliated because even though no names were named, it was obvious to those attending about whom Father was speaking.

It is a little thing and yet it has caused me no small amount of consternation.

Yet, in further contemplation, I realize it was the gentle touch of my Lord and Blessed Mother in allowing me shame that I might learn mercy and true humility of heart and mind.

Oh my Lord. I needed this lesson in humility so very much. I do want to share in your divine life and I realize now that I had to shed this attitude in order to cleanse my soul of all that is not worthy of you.

Sent from my Samsung Galaxy smartphone.

Setting things right

"Come now, let us set things right, says the Lord." ~Isaiah 1:18

This is the verse that speaks to my heart from today's readings. It sounds so much like something my own father might say to me after I have messed up.

It shows me that the Lord knows exactly how often I make mistakes and fall into sin.

It also shows me that He is ready to help me fix the things I have broken.

It gives me hope and I think it is cause for praise and joy. 

God wants to help me, heal me, mend my relationships and cleanse me from my sins.

How can I not find joy in this?

Oh my Lord. You are so wonderful to me. Forgive me my sins. Thank you for your many blessings. 

Sent from my Samsung Galaxy smartphone.

My Lord and My God

"How many times, Lord, have I forgotten that the Eucharist is alive! As I wait in line to receive you each day, am I thinking about how much you want to unite yourself with me? Am I seeing your hands filled with the graces you want to give me? Am I filled with awe and gratitude that you love me so much as to actually want to come to me in this incredibly intimate way?

~ Vinny Flynn, an excerpt from 7 Secrets of the Eucharist

Oh, my Jesus. I am so sorry for the times I have let my heart and mind wander during Communion.

Please forgive me and grant me the graces to become who you want me to be.

Sent from my Samsung Galaxy smartphone.

Sanctuary

"As long as I am in the world, I am the Light of the world." ~ John 9:5

This reminds me of a recent dream I had, reminding me Our Lord is present in the most Holy Eucharist and the Tabernacles where He resides are holy grounds.

He was and is and will be the Light of the world while the Church holds and priests remain who have been blessed with the gift of consecrating bread and wine into His most precious Body and Blood.

And just as the lamp on the lampstand gives light to the room, so the Eucharist gives Light to the "room" of the church in which He is adored and entire consecrated grounds.

When troubles come, we are to take refuge in the sanctuaries, the hallowed and holy grounds that have been made holy by He who resides there. 

Angels surround the sanctuaries, keeping them holy and allowing all who seek sanctuary therein to enter. 

Battle rages outside the sanctuaries and many souls are lost in the battle but those who remain within the sanctuaries are kept safe.  

Thank you my Lord, for your continued presence in the most holy Eucharist.

Keep me safe within your hallowed grounds.

Sent from my Samsung Galaxy smartphone.

Loving our Enemies

"Few of us have enemies but we all have those who hurt us in one way or another and we can be refusing our love to these. —Sr. Ruth Burrows, To Believe in Jesus, (Paulist Press); Magnificat, Feb. 2018, p. 357

This has been a lesson I have struggled with for many years, with varying degrees of success.

At one point, I prayed without ceasing for a woman who was causing me much distress. She was arrogant, condescending and dismissive of me, treating me as a person much lower than her. 

I did meet with some success when I finally could not spend my time worrying about her and what she was doing to thwart my success in work and in love. 

I'll never forget it because as I truly  surrendered my difficulties with her to the Lord and sincerely wished her well, I felt in my heart that sudden joy and ecstasy that filled my heart and soul. It was "my peace returning to me." 

The peace I tried to extend to her did not stay with her because she was not a peaceful person. (Paraphrasing Luke 10:6)

It was so sweet, this fruit of my prayers for one with whom I struggled. It was an eye opener to me about the true value of our prayers, how they do manifest around the world. It came back to me and it was wonderful.

If I had not prayed for good things for her, would I have ever experienced this extraordinary joy and love? 

"Give and gifts will be given to you; a good measure, packed together, shaken down, and overflowing, will be poured into your lap. For the measure with which you measure will in return be measured out to you." (Luke 6:38)

Ah, my Lord. You are so good and so worthy of our love and worship. Thank you!

Sent from my Samsung Galaxy smartphone.

Present Moment Awareness

For the second time this week, I have been shown that I need present moment awareness.

My friend explained it this way:

"Staying in the past, causes depression because we can't do anything to change some of the things that happened. Worrying about what might happen in the future does no good whatsoever and causes anxiety. The middle ground is staying exactly where we are and that is in the present; not worrying about what might happen, etc."

The second time was today in Lenten meditation by Matthew Kelley that states, "One of the things that prevents us from cooperating with God, from collaborating with God, in that patient, one-step-at-a-time way, is worry. We worry about things. We worry about, "Well what if this happens?" Or, "What if that happens?" Or, "What if this other thing happens?" And God is constantly calling us back from that and saying, "Focus on the moment. Focus on the moment. Be completely present in the moment. Be completely aware of what's happening to you, in you, around you in this moment."

So, my Lord and my God, I ask You this day for the gift of present moment awareness. Help me to be fully present in whatever I do this day, especially in my prayer life. I ask this in the Name of Jesus. Amen

Sent from my Samsung Galaxy smartphone.

Failing again

"I pray that, according to the riches of his glory, he may grant that you may be strengthened in your inner being with power through his Spirit, and that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith, as you are being rooted and grounded in love."

Ephesians 3:16-17

Such wondrous blessings from my Lord even though  I have had another bad day. I didn't sleep well and was tired most of the day, which almost always results in self-indulgent behavior..excessive time on social media sites and over eating.

Forgive me, Lord. Help me to do better tomorrow. 

Strengthen me with the power of your most Holy Spirit and inspire me to re-focus on my Lenten journey with you into the desert. 

Help me to pick myself up and follow you.

Sent from my Samsung Galaxy smartphone.

God's Plan

"One thing about doing the Lord's work: it doesn't always turn out according to our plans." ~Michael E. Gaitley in 33 Days to Morning Glory, day 2

This statement in Fr Gaitley's book comes after a section relating that St. Louis de Monfort had convinced hundreds of peasants to volunteer their labor and materials to build a monument to our Lord's passion. They spent 15 months working on it and the day before it was to be blessed by the Bishop, the government tore it down!

Although St. Louis de Monfort did build a monument by his life's work, it was not the one he intended.

Likewise for each of us. We sometimes get so focused on what we think we ought to be doing that we forget that God might have something else in mind.

Those alternative possibilities I wrote about yesterday are an example of this for me.

Lord, please help me to focus on your goals for my life..not mine. 

Thank you.

Sent from my Samsung Galaxy smartphone.

New Discoveries

"...the-best-version-of-yourself is not something you choose, it's something you discover." ~ Matthew Kelly, Best Lent Ever, Day 6 commentary

What are my unique talents and abilities, Lord? Please help me to discover who I am.

At some point today, I was gifted with a different view of circumstances that have been gnawing at me. A discovery of something....

The sense of relief was so palpable to me that I did laugh out loud. Mostly at myself for being such an idiot that I never considered alternate possibilities when I was stewing over this circumstance. 

My thought now is that my heart and/or soul are in possession of some piece of knowledge regarding the whole situation of which my brain isn't completely aware. This is because I am not sure of the situation..just that there are alternate possibilities which somehow aren't as frightening as the one I initially envisioned.

I recognize God's care of me in this whole scenario...that is what is also so delightful. 

It doesn't matter to me which of the alternates it eventually ends up being, because I do recognize and am totally certain of God's loving care of me and the deepest desires of my heart.

Another interesting facet is that I was prepared, like Abraham, to sacrifice my most beloved desire. The relief I felt today must be akin to what Abraham felt when he was stopped from sacrificing his beloved son.

It is comforting to know that God does not yet require me to sacrifice what is precious to me.

It is also humbling to discover that I am capable of doing so.

Lord, you are my God, my Master, my Savior, my Friend. I will strive to be obedient to you. Help me when or if I should falter.

Thank you!

Sent from my Samsung Galaxy smartphone.

Generosity

"A generous person will prosper. Whoever refreshes others will be refreshed." ~ Proverbs 11:25

Good morning my Lord!

Thank you for this life affirming gift of snow that we needed so badly. It is truly a blessing and I give you thanks and praise.

Today I am working on de-cluttering my abode and letting go of the past so that I might be cleansed in order to receive the fullness of Easter.

"Generosity of heart, mind and spirit when also being generous with your treasure..this is what I ask from you, my child. I love you deeply and dearly. Give that gift to someone who needs it."

Well, I didn't get accomplished what I wanted to this day. Instead, I did a practice run of our adult ed class. It went well.

Sent from my Samsung Galaxy smartphone.

Letting Go

"The sacrament (of confession) doesn't just empty us of the past; it also fills us with grace for the future." 

The Word Among Us, meditation on readings for today.

Good morning, Lord!

I was surprised at Mass today by the unexpected attendance of someone who isn't Catholic. 

I cannot say I was totally surprised because I have had glimpses of such happenings, but such an occurence has been something I have both feared and dreaded.

Yet, this didn't hurt as I expected. You know why I have feared this even when I should be rejoicing that another soul is in the process of being saved.

In the past when something similar to this happened, I felt you actually "zing" my heart. It felt like a dart had embedded itself in my heart and yet I knew it was a gift from you, in spite of the hurt and pain.

Today, I felt no zing but instead wrapped in your loving embrace and that also was a gift from you.

Two similar experiences; two different reactions with a space of 20 years or so in between.

I know you are asking me to let go of the past experiences I have had, that I may be cleansed in preparation for the graces you have planned for me.

Why does this make me somewhat sad and regretful? 

Because I have cherished those experiences as gifts of love from you. I have feared to lose them but in truth, they are not being manifested in my life anyway.

My precious child,

Do you trust me? Do you know that I want you to be the best version of yourself? Do you know that I will be with you through whatever sufferings you undergo?

If you indeed know these things, then you have no reason to fear or doubt.

I love you beyond all measure. I have good things in store for you. Priceless things...and I am pleased you are ready to empty yourself of the past in order that you might have life to the full. 

Thank you, my Lord. I trust you and know that you are guiding me and leading me ever closer to union with you.

Please grant me the graces I need to help You win this soul. Please help me to be gracious and fully and fittingly hospitable as you allow me to help you seek and save souls.

Sent from my Samsung Galaxy smartphone.