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| Snow covered hills |
I struggled today about saying "yes" to the Lord when he asked me to wake from my slumber and write. I do not know why...I do love the Lord with all my heart and soul and mind.
But an examination of my conscience tells me that while I profess to love him so, my actions and deeds speak of another love...self love and doing what I want to do, not what the Lord wants me to do.
Yet, how can I do this? How can I not want to love the Lord with my whole being...He who has given me everything and loves me so very much that He has taken my sins upon himself?
I long to be more like Mary, who immediately answered yes to her Lord, in the face of not knowing how His will would be accomplished or where His will would take her...she still answered yes. Inconvenience? It didn't matter as much as doing her Lord's will. What a remarkable woman Mary was then and remains to this day.
"Am I loving and serving God with my whole heart , mind and strength? Where can I do better? Am I waiting and watching for the Lord through daily prayer?"
Am I watching and waiting for the Lord through daily prayer? Sadly, no. My prayer life lately has been short and a series of orders I seem to give our Lord. Can you imagine the hubris of such an action? Why would I do such a thing? I have really gotten away from my prayer habits. It seemed to be so rote and without sincerity of late...although that is not the Lord's fault, but my own. How can I make it more meaningful? By simply sitting in the Lord's presence for a time and soaking in his loving care of me! What a beautiful way to prepare for his Coming.
Lord, please help me to better love you with all my strength and to rejoice in my daily preparations for your Coming amongst us. Help me to truly show my love for you by better obedience to your commands, by not choosing to "do it later" a bad habit that I have developed lately.
Lord, I do love you. Help me to know how to live in that love on a daily basis.
My Child,
Long have I waited for your coming unto Me, in simplicity and sincerity as you have done this day...after I prodded you. You can be so much and do so much in, with and through me. Try to be more like Mary, my Mother and your Mother, who didn't worry about the details of saying Yes. She knew the details would be handled by Me, if she chose to accept the role I gave her. So must you learn that the details are not for you to work out...I have already worked them out. You must prepare your Heart, first of all, to receive me fully. Then you will have no more concern about how the details will be worked out. Sweet one, I love you and do have a plan for you...believe it and rejoice in it. It is a most wonderful Christmas gift. Prepare your Heart.
