A small statement in the church bulletin on All Saints Day caught my attention. It said that St. Paul didn't spend all his time doing religious or spiritual things.
Rather, he simply listened for the voice of God, did what he was commanded to do and incorporated that into his every day life. I can do that, I thought.
My Sunday and Monday were spent in the joyous ecstasy of knowing God's will for me and talking almost continuously to God from the heart. Or, as He has told me in the past, in having a real heart to heart conversation.
It was an exquisite couple of days, those moments when you absolutely positively KNOW that God is God and loves you on a deeply personal level. It is a priceless consolation and a time to be cherished.
However sweet those days are, they cannot be sustained else we would die of ecstasy. I spent the next two days trying to hold onto the sweet memory of what had been revealed to me during those heart to heart conversations.
Still a joyous time, but more grounded. I didn't yet have the opportunity to put into practice the things I had heard.
On Wednesday evening, I received what I considered to be a command from God for the next day. It was simple, yet not something I would do on an ordinary weekday.
I was determined to obey, however, because I was sure it was something God was asking me to do. It was to wear a certain outfit that I would normally consider too nice for just an ordinary weekday.
When I woke up on Thursday morning, however, I was distracted. I couldn't/didn't focus my prayers on Christ. I was focused on myself. I did wear what the Lord had asked me to wear. Because He had asked it of me, I was waiting for something special to happen. I thought I would be meeting someone whom the Lord wanted me to meet and that "something big" would happen.
So I was giddy, somewhat silly, distracted and not ready for the big moment when it actually happened.
Or rather, I should honestly say, in the moment when I heard God's command to me:
"Smile and say hello," to a person, I lost the moment.
I panicked and found an escape route so that I wouldn't make eye contact with the person and neither smiled nor said hello.
Forgive me, Lord, for not obeying your simple command to me. It is a moment that is lost and cannot be found again.
I pray that it was a lesson God wanted to teach me and not something that will cause the person to lose faith or their soul.
It was such a simple command and I failed to do it. Forgive me, my Lord, for failing to obey your simple command to me.
There are many lessons to be found in this experience. I pray that I will have a future opportunity to obey and actually DO what God asks of me.
1) God's commands are often the really simple, ordinary things He wants us to do in our everyday life, like just smiling at someone and saying hello.
2) We must stay focused on Christ in order to do what He asks of us in a way that will be beneficial to others and to ourselves.
3) The true joys of life are found in obedience to God's commands to us.
4) While we may be called upon to do "something big" for God, we should be prepared to do the little things well on a daily basis. Those little things might turn out to be "something big."
5) Once the moment is gone, it's truly gone. You may have an opportunity to act again or you may not. Be prepared for the moment when you are called.
I shudder to think of the consequences of how I have failed my God when I panicked and lost the moment of action, of obedience in doing God's will.
I pray that it was a lesson time; when He was showing me that any action, when done in His will, can be a "something big" moment. And that by not doing what I was commanded, I pray I didn't cause someone to lose faith.
I pray that I will have another opportunity to smile and say hello to someone with whom the Lord wants me to speak.
Thank you, my Lord and my God for all your blessings. Forgive me for my failures and please don't give up on me. Please give me another opportunity to do what you command of me.
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